Thank-You Cards 101: Writing the Perfect One
A well-written thank you note is easy to make when you know the recipe – simply mix one part accepted etiquette with two parts you.
When to Send...
You'll have to think long and hard to come up with an instance when sending a thank-you card isn't the right thing to do. So the gates are wide open.
Send a thank you note after the dinner party that turned into a dance party, for the help you received from a colleague on your big presentation, after the visit to a friend's country house or cabin.
Almost any time is the right time to send a thank-you card. It'll make you feel good, and it'll make them feel good, too.
Timing: Follow Protocol (Within Reason)
When sending thank you notes, there is really only one "rule" you need to follow. And that is to be timely.
The official "rules" say you have three days. But with kids and work and your stellar social life, we think one week is a good goal to shoot for. The event is fresh in everybody's mind, and that makes it especially easy to write about, too. If you find that the week has flown by—or you've literally been flying the whole week— send it as soon as you can. In this case, better late than never definitely applies. (All the rule-makers agree on that one.)
What to Write About…And How!
The most important thing about a thank-you note is to fully convey how much you appreciate the gift. Key words here are "you" and "appreciate." So, first tip is to write your thank-you note the way you talk. Contractions, enthusiastic punctuation, and polite slang are allowed. And we suggest you don't start your personal message with "Thank you for the…." Those wouldn't be the first words out of your mouth after opening a gift, and they don't have to be the first words of your thank-you note.
Part One: Instead, open with how appropriate the gift is and how wonderful the gift-giver is: "You've always understood my sense of design…." Or open with the highlights of a weekend spent together: "We just loved the cocktail runs on the lake and have been talking about them ever since."
Part Two: After the warm welcome, feel free to directly show appreciation for the gift. Yes, now is the time to write the words "Thank you for the
Part Three: Finally, there are many ways to sign-off. We think looking ahead to the next time you plan to see, speak, or just think of each other is a cheerful way to close. "We'd love to have you over soon to finish that wicked game of bridge we started in the Hamptons." or "Let's debrief after next week's Project Runway so we can fully gush about how much we love Tim Gunn."
That Certain Je Ne Sais Quoi
Your thank-you card will resonate when it's in your own voice, but consider also including a little something more. Consider a photo from the getaway weekend that shows you with your hosts. Or perhaps a pressed wildflower from your stay. It could be a specialty chocolate or an invitation to coffee (at a specific date and time). Just remember this: You don't want to throw the gift-giving ball back in their court. You merely want to make your thank-you note special.
